Three Weeks of Autumn in Kyoto will be my 10th journey to Japan. As those thoughts form, they dance in the company of emotions and memories from earlier trips, like this one.
Making friends with Yuji Ishihara.
on ken, koh yu, ko ji.
When I first met Yuji, I didn't know I'd be the last friend he'd ever make. He was dying but I wouldn't know that for two years. I didn't know that his afterlife Buddhist character name would be:
on ken, koh yu, ko ji.
“On ken stands for kindness". Most fitting as I felt deep kindness in his character from our first day together. You see, upon the death of someone in Japan, they are given a new Buddhist name for the afterlife. Sohji, his son took the time to sketch out the details of ... on ken, koh yu, ko ji. (see the post-it below, on the left.
on ken ... means kindness
koh yu ... means Buddhist World
ko ji ... means Sir
Sohji told me in advance of my upcoming trip that his father would not be home. That he'd be in the hospital for chemotherapy. I asked if Yuji would be able to take a visit from me. Sohji picked me up at the Okayama train station and took me straight to the hospital where Yuji introduced me to his chemo friends. He shared my gift box of See's Candy chocolates with them, they, happy for the unexpected sweet treat. Then we walked back to his hospital room for a long chat in private. He was happy for my visit and towards the end of our time together he asked: "Does this mean we're friends now?” Knowing Yuji loved philosophy I quoted Aristotle who once said: "What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies.” We sat enjoying the quiet.
Yuji showing his Family Koseki
I went to Japan in search of the land of my mother's parents. I wanted to walk the paths they walked before leaving Japan in 1906. Along that journey I met Sohji and his father Yuji Ishihara, a hidden genius who could solve the most impenetrable mysteries. This is about My Friend Yuji...
Yuji knew I could find my mother's Japanese cousins by visiting the oldest Buddhist monk in Niimi (left) . The next day Yuji drove me to Konzoji Buddhist Temple. I knocked politely on the door, a were greeted by a younger monk who escorted us to a meeting room for tea. Yuji knew that the old monk knew every family in Niimi and his knowledge of local history would be the best place to learn about my Ishihara and Kobayakawa lineage. The old priest studied my koseki (official genealogical document) and after about 10 minutes, his eyes widened, reflecting on a memory. He jumped out of his chair and motioned for me to follow him to a window overlooking an expansive valley below. Pointing to one story buildings in the distant valley he said:
"See those two buildings? The white one on the right is a hospital. Your mother's cousin is a nurse, she works there!"
And so in this manner Yuji drove me to that building on the right. Tamaki Ishihara, my mother would have been happy to meet her cousin Kyoko Kobayakawa.
Much later I learned in California that Yuji had terminal lung cancer. Now that I look back on my moments with Yuji Ishihara, I get the feeling I was spending time with Buddha.
Sohji told me in advance of my upcoming trip that his father would not be home. That he'd be in the hospital for chemotherapy. I asked if Yuji would be able to take a visit from me. Sohji picked me up at the Okayama train station and took me straight to the hospital where Yuji introduced me to his chemo friends. He shared my gift box of See's Candy chocolates with them, they, happy for the unexpected sweet treat. Then we walked back to his hospital room for a long chat in private. He was happy for my visit and towards the end of our time together he asked: "Does this mean we're friends now?” Knowing Yuji loved philosophy I quoted Aristotle who once said: "What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies.” We sat enjoying the quiet.
